For the most part, I think a lot of women are more predisposed to entertain the idea of marriage then men, a combination of biological (having babies) and cultural/social concerns. Given that focus, I think women spend a greater amount of time evaluating their potential marriage partners, trying to weigh the decision seriously, and they usually start much earlier than you think in the relationship - generally, before you have a clue whatÕs really going on. Once sheÕs decides your Mr. Right, your going to hear about it, one way or the other.
I wouldnÕt freak out about it. ItÕs not the end of the world or the relationship. Because she finds you marriage material, which is immensely important to her, sheÕs not going to pressure you into making a decision your not ready to make. Women are much more patient than that, and besides, she probably has your entire life as a couple mapped out already. No one wants to throw all of that away for the sake of some impertinent timing. Sooner or later - probably sooner, - sheÕll realize that sheÕs reaching a stage of diminishing returns with references to marriage and that itÕs really putting things out of balance, perhaps even threatening the basis of the relationship. The very opposite of the intended effect. Enter plan B.
Just like Mohammed AliÕs rope-a-dope, sheÕll spend the next several rounds letting you wear yourself out being who you want to be, with a little jab here and there to remind you sheÕs still there. No references to marriage, they never happened. Then, when you donÕt even realize that your weary, that all you have left in you is the ability to say yes, sheÕll hit you with the question. Before you know it, you own a tuxedo, your walking down the aisle, wondering how it all happened and why youÕre so happy.
In the meantime, I suggest a little social experiment. Purely optional, of course. Instead of taking her to an expensive, fancy restaurant, surprise her and take her to something more downscale. Not Kentucky Fried Chicken, but something on the order of, letÕs say, TadÕs steak house. Then see if you still get the royal treatment in the sack when you get home. If you do, thereÕs no point hanging out in this hobby, at least, not in my book.
Printer-friendly version of this topic
Bookmark this topic (Registered users only)
Red Book Diaries (Public)
